Top 5 Trollin: Alert Rich, jus utendi et abutendi & the proletariat

So I continue to monitor my Google alerts around Top 5, I tracked top 12 (no traffic) and I tracked Top 7 as well – 1 hit in months. Readers are some of the most insightful folks and other writers do love their Top 5 list and more like to refer to other peoples Top 5 lists – creativity is alive and well! What qualifies as a reasonable list? Wit? Detail? A cool Title?

The most reasonable list according to many authors who linked to it, is the Top 5 SEO and Link Building Challenges for 2008 which have cluttered my inbox. (Uh oh – I have possibly broken the linking rules for good [tag]SEO[/tag]!) I’m so appreciative for the ideas of others, but I am continuously curious about what is of interest and what is not for readers, because while I appreciate that a good deal of words were written – I don’t know why so many people linked back.

The other list of multiple linking was the Top 5 Tips on Making Machinima, apparently a type of gamer movie thing. The most useful list I found was the Top 5 greasemonkey scripts to pimp my new GMail, but I don’t have any idea what to do with it. Wish I did as that FB GMail scripts, looks like a cool thing – maybe. Have you installed GMail scripts? Anywho, back to what you want to read or not, my random retort to a very challenging Canadian – Paul.

At Paulitics a very interesting Top5 List – Top 5 Things I saw in America which, as a Canadian, freaked me right out! First I say only 5? Then, I read them and I thought – really those 5? Fundamentally we have this thing called free speech in the US, it is some inalienable right thing, which was further outlined in a thing called the Bill of Rights and it appears 4 of your complaints are around that, which are fairly important things to American folk.

(tongue firmly planted in cheek for the majority of the rest of the post)

While I think your blog’s name is clever – I think your response is a little too Canadian. A little too “our currency is at parity and we can now buy the goods of the bourgeoisie without doing math” uppity member of the proletariat. A little too “can I get some mayonnaise for my French Fries – no Mayo?!?! How about some vinegar or gravy?” My response is really just in response to item #4, in your inverse ordered list:

A breakfast creation in upstate New York called “Stuffed French Toast”. What does “Stuffed French Toast” entail, you naïve non-American might ask? It’s French Toast (which, keep in mind is cooked in butter) stuffed with bacon, eggs and processed cheese (which they proudly call ‘American processed cheese’, I presume, to distinguish it from real cheese which could, after all, be French and/or offer unAmerican nutritional content). But here’s the kicker: on top of your “Stuffed French Toast” cooked in butter, you will find… a square of butter.

I don’t know what to say, except to create my own retort in the form of a Top 5 list.

 

Top 5 Reasons Stuffed French Toast Should be Awarded the most American Recipe Ever.

 

  • Everything is better cooked in butter!
  • Americans, specifically the xenophobe set, can’t accept anything French without improving upon it and topping with a pat of butter as a is a great start, since cooking with butter is not the same as topping it with butter.
  • Processed cheese isn’t just tasty – it is also an optimal cholesterol delivery device which is perfectly square and melts more evenly than real cheddar cheese. Completely american – style over substance.
  • Bacon is the meat of champions and pork products are best served wrapped in a bread product.
  • Eggbeaters are always a heart smart alternative, if not available, ain’t no never mind since Zocor is just a co-pay away.

But I must say, I did enjoy Paul’s Marx-to-English Dictionary post, so I’ve added you to my reader, mainly so I can reflect on my Workers World days. Thanks for the list Paul and the fun, I’ll keep reading!

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1 Comment

  • Reply jon gatrell January 11, 2008 at 9:53 pm

    retooled ui – thoughts? http://tinyurl.com/yp7o55

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